I've been looking for truth and love for as long as I can remember. Truth, because I'm gullible and have been hurt as a result. Love, because I felt insecure and lonely. I figured that there must be someone I could trust enough to open myself up to who would not ridicule me.
As I looked for truth and love in relationships, I would eventually feel let down, even if hurting me were the last thing intended. In time, I stopped looking for truth and love in people.
I started investigating the idea that something 'higher' existed in the spiritual world, something that governed the laws of truth and love. I became a student of astrology. I was excited by how often and accurately it outlined people's character and events of their life.
I thought that through astrology I could be a better friend and could gain people's love. However, after four years of study I saw that although my belief in astrology would amuse people, they would rarely take it or me seriously. I felt even lonelier and more frustrated than before. I also began to have serious questions about life that I could not find answers for in astrology.
At this time I met a woman who had attended church all her life. She had recently learned some exciting things about Jesus Christ that had changed her life. I thought that astrology was one of many ways to God, but she was adamant that Jesus Christ was the only way.
After many late-night debates, I finally agreed to look at the Bible for myself. When I did, I learned amazing things about Jesus Christ: that He was God in the flesh, that He was Truth, that He loved me so much He suffered and died so that I could be with Him forever if I believed in Him and His resurrection from the dead.
I heard a couple of questions about astrology that really challenged me. If astrology was such a precise mathematical science-and I believed it was-why didn't the wise men find the Christ child on the day He was born and in the exact place He was born? Also, if astrology is one of many ways to God, why did King Herod use astrology to try to kill Jesus? After all, He loves everyone in the world and planned to die to save people from spending eternity apart from Him in torment? As I thought about these questions, I knew that astrology could never be a way to God. I told Jesus that if He was truth, and He loved me more than anyone else could love me, that I wanted to be with Him forever, starting now. I told Him that He could have control in my life.
After I did this, my loneliness and insecurity faded away, replaced instead by peace and comfort. I had finally found what I was looking for all my life: someone who would love me completely and never deceive me. Since then, I've grown to love Him more and more. I realize that in addition to loving me, He has given my life exciting purpose. I am able to reach out to others in their loneliness and insecurity-with His love--to tell them how much He loves them.
Copyright 2001 Power to Change.Used with permission.
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