1. Take Risks
Ask Sir Edmund Hillary what he felt like while standing at the base of Mount Everest, looking up, just before he set out on his dangerous mission. Many had tried and failed. Who was to say that he could pull it off? He had absolutely no guarantee that he would succeed and yet he risked it.
A risk is defined as the possibility of suffering harm, danger, or loss. By definition, risk-taking involves the potential for failure. At the same time, a risk also offers the possibility of success and victory.
We’ve all heard the saying, “Nothing ventured, nothing gained”. Nothing ventured, nothing gained - nothing is truer. And nothing is scarier than responsibility—which is a type of risk. The dictionary further defines responsibility as,
“a form of trustworthiness; the trait of being answerable to someone for something or being responsible for one's conduct.”
Responsibility means being capable of enjoying the rewards of triumph as well as being accountable for disappointing behaviour. There are two sides to this coin.
But if you never take on the risk of responsibility, you never get the chance to savour the treat of success. That’s why overcoming fear of failure is of such huge importance.
The best way of learning to take risks is simply taking on responsibility, even when a cop-out option presents itself. Start off with small responsibilities and work your way up. Start with committing to do the dishes after supper (not too much room for failure there), and work your way up to organizing a community event, such as a fundraiser for victims of physical abuse. Whatever you choose to do, refuse to be intimidated or paralyzed by fear of failure.
Responsibility builds strength as you learn from taking charge of “mini-missions”. You develop traits that build your character--something that is far more valuable than temporary success.
2. Explore the Ordinary
So, you’re stuck at a less-than-ideal job while you’re paying off your student loan. Why not take that opportunity to serve in your community? Search for simple ways you can help:
- Mentor or tutor a struggling neighbourhood kid
- Rake leaves or shovel snow for the elderly on your street
- help to pack food hampers at a homeless shelter
This will help you to see the bigger picture by taking the focus off yourself (and any existing mountain of DVDs and videogames). You’ll develop a greater sense of purpose as you spend time with people and see your efforts make a difference.
Whether it’s helping out at a youth shelter or just offering to babysit the kids of a single mom in your neighbourhood, this is a great time in your life to offer your time to others. After a full-time career takes over, such unique opportunities will be few.
Experience what it means to brighten someone’s life with your youthful energy and abilities. Make some new friends and prepare yourself for future leadership.
3. Develop Endurance
If you’ve ever watched the Tour de France, you’ve seen some excellent endurance role models. With perspiration running down their faces and a steep climb ahead, bikers lean forward with an iron will to win the yellow jersey. Nothing would be easier than to pull over and call it quits. But it’s the promise of a prize and recognition that keeps them giving it all they’ve got. They’re committed to a higher goal.
It’s not that different when it comes to being a twixter. You might not be going through life wearing biker shorts, but you do have a greater goal.
You’re trying to break out of a life stage that you’re stuck in. Your goal is to press on to enjoy the “yellow jersey” that your life stage has to offer. Stick with it. Don’t give up. Even when things are mundane. That’s when the true endurance challenge presents itself.
This endurance challenge demands commitment. After all, how can you know if you will win the prize if you don’t stick with it? For better or for worse? In smooth or hilly terrain? There is no substitute for iron-willed commitment. Such firm resolution is the ticket to both growth and success.
Mark Twain said:
“Do something everyday that you don’t want to do. This is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain”.
Try it. Do something you don’t want to do. Like staying in to (gulp) enjoy your mom’s meatloaf rather than visit a restaurant. You might suffer temporary discomfort, but in the long run you ’re doing yourself a huge favour. You are training yourself for independent adult life when eating out will be a special treat, not a common occurrence.
4. Get help from an Online Mentor
Growing out of twixterhood is hard work--especially if you try to do it alone.
Why not contact one of our trained mentors who can help you with the ups and downs of twixter life? They can share tips on how to break free from bad habits and can encourage you as you take the plunge into the challenges of adulthood.
Develop a one-on-one email mentoring relationship. Anything you share with them is completely confidential. You’ll notice the difference a caring friend can make. Need to talk? Need advice from a mentor? Ask us.
5. Get to know God
The wisest man who ever lived, King Solomon, had this to say about life:
I denied myself nothing my eyes desired;
I refused my heart no pleasure.
My heart took delight in all my work,
and this was the reward for all my labor.
Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done
and what I had toiled to achieve,
everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind;nothing was gained under the sun
(Ecclesiastes 2:10, 11).
King Solomon had a pretty satisfying life. He took time to relax and enjoy himself but also worked hard to accomplish things. Yet, when he looked at everything he had achieved, he wasn’t satisfied.
Solomon was at the top of the success ladder:
- Distant kings visited him to view his splendorous palace.
- He had the highest IQ anywhere—wise teachers from across the world came to hear him speak.
- He did not lack female companionship, either.
Yet, despite all this, he found only one thing that could be counted as gain: his personal relationship with the God of the universe.
Maybe this wise guy’s success secret is worth looking into…Here are some details:
-- God created you and knows you better than you know yourself. He knows your talents and weaknesses.
-- He knows your dreams and is aware of your struggles growing up.
-- He’s in a position to offer the best possible help to you in any situation and he deeply desires to do so.
However, he can only offer this if you talk to him and enter into a personal relationship with him. How does one go about becoming close friends with God?
Decision-making and other challenges will still be tough sometimes—troubles don’t all disappear after saying yes to God. But what an encouragement it is to know that you’re not alone in facing these life struggles.
How great to know that a loving, powerful, and faithful friend is walking you through them!
What's a Twixter? 1.2.3.4.
Bea is an English student who by no means has the whole twixter thing figured out. She loves reading anything that's not assigned for homework, skiing, taking nature walks, and playing with Stormy, her hopelessly-untrained Siberian Husky. Copyright © iamnext.com 2005. May not be reprinted without permission.
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Copyright © iamnext.com 2005. May not be reprinted without permission.
